Thanking God for unanswered prayers.


People sing it, but its more than a song, its so true.

I used to wish Id marry the boy I dated at 15, the one I lost my virginity to.

I used to wish I could run away from home, to somewhere far far away.

I used to wish I could stop feeling so much.

I used to wish Id find a man who would be everything I always pictured.

But had I married that boy, I never would have found the man of my dreams.

Had I ran away, Id never know my nephews the way that I do, or have the strength in my friendships that I do.

Had I stopped feeling so much, I never would have learned how beautiful the world is, or how wonderful love feels.

Had I found the man Id always pictured, I wouldn’t be surprised every day.  I would never get mad and feel intense anger, then feel intense happiness.  I’d never have found the man I’ve been with for four and a half years.

I know this isnt the wittiest or bitterest or most compelling post, but it is what it is. 

Everything I am is a part of everything I’ve lost.

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